“We share the same interest/ I think who I am and being me is somehow a turn off/ I am comfortable with whom I am which is becoming a struggle especially in the face of rejection by men.” We’re sometimes ‘forced’ to start living and giving up on some core values because of relationships and people we want to pursue.
Others on the other hand hold a firm belief that sharing common/same interests is enough to keep an ‘expired’ relationship going. If we meet somebody who enjoys or shares the same interest as you, we think we’ve met our soulmate. In essence, they’re similar to us because we share the same interests. At some point, you want to settle down and enjoy a long-term committed relationship but apart from the same interests you share with the ‘boyfriend/girlfriend’, your aspirations, dreams and what you require/expect in a life partner is very different to what they want/who they are.
People are threatened with differences and they dissolve a union based on ‘we’re too different’ because they believe they need to have so much in common. Some try to please by morphing and blending to ‘fit into the bill’ of the other. None of us can truly say that giving up the right to be our true selves is for purely altruistic reasons and so when you examine what it is that you expect to gain from trying to please others by morphing and blending, you will see that you’re setting you up for pain and that there’s more authenticity and less pain in being you.