Relationships come and go, some leaving you with swearings of never loving again. Whether platonic, cordial, coined on deceit, or nurtured with love and honesty, not every relationship ends with the ultimate, marriage. Whichever way a relationship may be packaged or labelled, once it ends a loop is created and only time may be capable of tightening that loop. Even the no strings attached kind of relationship comes with its own pain.
Many may not admit but sex plays an integral role in a relationship. Aside the unapologetic I love you’s and the no sense chats amidst the nags and the irrelevant banters, how else can a couple have any form of deep conversation if not through sex? Do not misconstrue my stance to mean that nothing in depth can be said except through sex. Sex has been said to be the deepest way of communicating and I agree for what happens during sex is simply soulful.
We can live with what we have not had before but it is quite difficult if not impossible to live with what we’ve had before. With an explosive past sexual life, settling for anything less has never been on my radar. The thought of not getting the utmost satisfaction during sex is a phobia that cripples my very senses– but I guess we are often confronted with what we fear.
I was having a conversation with this guy– not any serious kind of conversation though but the kind that has a hidden motive behind it, when I decided to make him an adventure to subdue the incessant boredom that was rippling me apart. Yes I was being extremely selfish, well who knows maybe he had questionable motives too. My priority was to experience him in every sense of the word. The truth is I wanted to render a disservice to him by satisfying my ever growing sex urge. For someone who appeared very sensual and striking sex drive, what I was offered was simply below the belt.
Maybe I should have just stayed with my ex because though I was always at his throat, our sexual encounters was just incomparable and beyond ‘heavens’. Part of the reasons why I stayed in such a daunting “relation-shit” for that long was the inevitable fear of meeting someone who couldn’t pitch me perfectly in a sexual way.
So this boy was not just bad with handling the cookie, he sucked from start to finish.
How anyone could not know how to kiss is like trying to figure out how a baby does not know how to suck breast, is it not supposed to be a natural phenomenon? The foreplay was the worst ever and you dare not ask me about the sex. It was like asking a toddler to thread a needle; pathetically sinful. I knew I had reached “rock buttom” with the dude though we didn’t have any substantial relationship. Let’s just say it was a one-night stand gone bad.
I couldn’t take such tiresome job of tutoring a grown ass man how to handle a lady in bed. I did him and every other lady he would come across a lot of good by telling him to up his game. The shock of me (I don’t know why most of them don’t expect Ghanaian ladies to be vocal about sex) telling him how bad he did in bed made up for how badly he had sucked under the sheets.
Although I am in no way going back to my ex, I am done with these “good” boys.
I am tired of accepting mediocrity in the name of love. If the sex sucks, I am dumping your ass the next minute. It’s not selfishness, I am looking out for our monogamous future.