We harbour some bitterness towards other people in us which in actual fact, it’s not warranted. Relationships are birthed and they as well die and one person starts playing the victim – and it’s usually the women. Even if a relationship lasts for 6 months, they’ll still cry the man wasted their time. If you don’t give your time to someone, they won’t waste it. The only people who have (finish) sex with a frown are the ones who didn’t consent to it and were forcibly penetrated – any other one is enjoyed by two (with legs raised in the air).
There’s something in marketing and law called ‘invitation to treat’, it’s up to you the consumer to accept the invitation (to buy) or to refuse. It’s the same with relationships, you either accept to be with someone or refuse their advances. If things are not working out the way you dreamt it will be, you exterminate, disengage or withdraw. You don’t accept and follow in their footsteps and later complain they wasted your time. During the initial stages, it’s forgivable to ‘do’ emotional reasoning but after the ‘honeymoon’ period, it’s time to take the logical route.
Most of the time, in relationships, our ‘love interest’ tells us in more than a thousand ways that they’re not heading to where we’re going but either we trust ourselves so much or we think they can’t do without us so we ignore their ‘warnings’ and still follow them hoping our ‘waist winding’ and gifts will change their minds. When reality sets in, we start crying foul! There’s a difference between faith and facing reality.
Some of us willingly ignore people’s selfishness, abusive nature, narcissistic tendencies, arrogance (which always goes in hand with disrespect) because we think the person is cute (in our eyes), smart (maybe), successful, etc. and go into relationships with them. They leave and we still cry? People whose negatives outweigh their positives? Oh girl – you better have a rethink.
We can’t stop the way people reason, their opinions and their behaviour/habits/core values – that we don’t have the power over – how we react to their actions is totally up to us. We have the power to allow/disallow their ‘way of life’ to influence our decisions or change mind-set about us and our personality.
I may not be up-to-date in some stuff, but I thought/think a man is supposed to buy/give an engagement ring to the woman he intends marrying…? If as a lady you buy yourself a ring (not sure if it’s to deceive friends or to let the man quicken his decision) and you use that small metal to ward off other men because you’re taken – and things turn sour; how did he block all your chances to love? I don’t get it and I’m yet to understand why women buy themselves engagement rings because they have a boyfriend!!
The last time I checked NO and ENOUGH was very much in use. A man didn’t waste your time; you wasted your own time. The only thing you can do about it is to keep moving and clean that frown off your face and bitterness from your heart. The frown is scaring the nice gentleman around the corner who is very much interested. Next time, you just don’t sit in the passenger seat and allow someone drive you whilst keeping mute. He thinks you’re enjoying the ride.
Nobody can enter your house and disrespect you, unless you open the door and allow them in. It always takes two to tango. If you pose as a cow, don’t expect to be fed as a chicken – simple as that!