More often than not, many young girls like me buy into the concept of giving relationships a try. And we say to ourselves that, with time the love will set in but what we fail to ask is this; what if the love never develops or falls in?
Five years ago, I was a young beautiful woman with the world at my feet and ready to explore my options as an African woman. I have always been opened to dating all race—-as long as the man is decent enough to treat me well.
It was during my peak season of dating that I met the Dad of my 4 year baby-Leslie, who I love so much but on the other hand, Leslie is the glue sticking me to a situation I find repulsive.
When I met my baby’s father, I knew from his dealings he loved me and still loves me but I had no drop of love for him—yet decided to play along under the assumption that the love will come.
Less than 6 months, I got pregnant and then had Leslie who has been a total blessing to me. But I still do not love this man who sleeps by me each night, tries to cuddle me each night and pays all the attention to me each time of the day.
I try as much as I can to respond, to fake love and to let the father of my baby feel loved but how long can I continue to do this? How long can I continue to deceive him, deceive myself and eventually Leslie?
I’ve tried it all and despite the kindness and overreaching support, the love is not forthcoming…I believe and have accepted that I am stuck with a man I do not love—and I will never experience how it feels to truly love someone.
I am sure some of you will be asking; what are you still doing with a man you do not love? I wish I can walk away but it is not that easy. I have Leslie and above all, this man has done nothing wrong, it is my fault and it was my mistake so I will rather endure the pain and not pass it on to him.
Each day comes with mix feelings for me. I wake up to the smile of the sun when I see Leslie and when I think far about my situation, the darkness of sorrow sets in.
I’ve come to accept my situation and I think I should live with it. Until I find a real solution which will work wonders, this is my story and I pray no young woman experiences what I am going through.
It sucks to be loved and not be able to love back.
From: Linda Amankwah F./ Germany
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In the first place, is he your husband or just ur baby’s daddy whom u re Cohabiting with???? Ur answer would help me understand ur situation better and give an advise.
@nana yaa, just my baby’s daddy whom i am cohabitting with
To be frank I think u are being selfish here unrecipocrated luv hurts like hell. Sit him down and tell him outright no sugar coating of words explain how u feel and let him understand. He will be angry and hate u for a while but that pain will go away and he will be grateful to u in the long run. For all u know he also knows u don’t have feelings for him but he can’t complain cos u are not saying anything . It will always have to get ugly before it gets beautiful
@frog, yeah.. I love that… but I would advice that she stays with him and find other things to love about him such as his nice child he gave her, his appreciation of her… because the reverse can also be true… where you find the one you love and the person doesn’t love you back.. that will hurt even more.
No sympathy here for you at all. How about loving someone for real !!before having a baby with them. Just be frank with your baby papa. And save yourself form the constant pretence and above all save the poor guy for humiliation .People like you don’t need to loved at all. Feel sorry the baby
@Cece enima, damnnn u are ice cold
@frog, see bro this is exactly how is supposed to said!!
is she serious at all? this is very lame and u should do the man a favour by telling him the truth and hide your shameful face…if he was not responsible u would have left him by now, u would have been able to tell him that u dont love him….am sure he showers u with all the material things every woman wants so u cant leave him….u are very wicked to do this to him…how come u love his child and u are hurting the father???