Some Ghanaian workers have not had their salaries and allowances paid for months… Somehow, they survive (call it living by magic). It is not that we are superhuman. We have only been blessed with the most efficient coping mechanisms. Hope is a product made in Ghana. Hope made outside Ghana is an imitation.

The Ghanaian hope, albeit based on nothing, is far stronger and more useful. So when we experience poverty and corruption and underdevelopment, we hope that things get better. There is no basis for this — the government will not do anything differently, we will not do anything differently. We just hope. It is the hope that carries us through different leaders and governments.

While we hope, however, there are some identified practical tools to help through our journey in life:

Our number one coping mechanism is our darling pastor. Anything or any step we take, we call the ‘God’ of our pastor and it shall be well with us. Just shout ‘God of Pastor…, I commit this into your hand. Whether we know the source of the pastor’s ‘God’ or not, it doesn’t matter.

Motivational books: Every Ghanaian who can write his/her name knows the value of a foreign motivational book. If you don’t have one, you are not complete. You can however remedy this by going to the nearest junction, where, in the hold-up, you will find glossy treasures of How to Be a Successful CEO; Seven Habits of highly Successful People. It doesn’t matter that you will probably never become a CEO. It just helps to know. A motivational book keeps you going even when your salary has not been paid. Cherish your motivational book. Take it along when you are going out. It doesn’t really matter if you read it. The intention reflected in your always having the book in your sweaty palms is all that matters.

Alomo bitters: This is one of the greatest cheap gifts to Ghanaians. Thanks to a company called Kasapreko Company Limited who has been producing this herbal alcoholic wonder packed with such fast-acting power that I can swear that Ghanaians have been happier since it came to town (ask the blue kiosk operators). You see, the battles we fight daily mean we are in an emergency. There is no time or money for beer, wine and other weak drinks that take forever to give happiness. Alomo goes to the heart of the matter, quickly dealing with whatever sorrows the nation may have directly or indirectly heaped on you. The night is not complete without it. Our life expectancy is already so low. Why live it in sorrow?

Telenovelas/Drama/Series: Find one and be hopelessly addicted to it. It doesn’t matter which one. You need to immerse yourself in these stories, usually about the whole universe conspiring against a steamy love affair. Those who look down on it don’t realise that it is a metaphor for the situation we always find ourselves in. When you watch Mexican telenovelas, even the way their voices are different from the mouth movements is a metaphor for our politicians who say one thing but mean another. It’s just a matter of sitting in your chamber and hall and fantasise about living in that mansion your favourite TV couple ‘live’ in.

Facebook: We now have a place where we can be activists, insult the government, post nice flattering pictures of ourselves and generally blab about how magnificent or miserable our hustle is. You’re even allowed to do a bit of photo shopping by posing with your lovely ‘boyfriend’ you’ve never met to make other singletons jealous.  Nothing is more therapeutic than a good hearty rant or hating on others. If you can write your name, please get a Facebook account. It is free and it will give you the joy and hope of looking forward to Mr Right’s arrival.

We suspend all our common sense to the Glory of God; and ascribing all our problems to demonic or spiritual attacks, which keeps ‘His’ messengers busy and well financed. Our strongest painkiller for our problems is God – not to find solutions.