Dear GC,
Just 6 months ago I can honestly say I was depressed and heartbroken after being jilted the day before my wedding day. I was so happy and confident on that day and I had no idea that could happen to me. I had been with my now ex for almost 4 years when he proposed to me.
I was so happy and had been hoping for this day to come as I loved him so much. The two families really came together to support us and arrange the wedding. He said he did not want a long engagement and so after the proposal we set a date.
I was wondering why the hurry as I was not expecting to walk down the aisle so soon after he proposed. As he insisted a date was set for three months after, I worked like a mad woman with my bridesmaids and family to arrange our wedding.
I guess I should have seen some signs as he didn’t get so involved in the preparation but my friend said this is normal and most men do not get involved in arranging and just got on with the planning and I had help so I didn’t feel too bad.
When my ex fiancée called me the night before the wedding to say he had travelled to Manchester where his best man lives and he cannot go through with the wedding, I actually dropped to the floor with the phone still in my hand. I didn’t cry until I was alone at night though my mum insisted I come back to their house instead of staying at the hotel.
I think she was scared of what I would do as she kept checking on me. I cannot describe the heartbreak and the embarrassment of having to tell my family and bridesmaids. I refused to contact his family initially as I was too upset.
All this happened three months ago now, at the time he refused to pick my calls or speak to my people. Now last week he came to my work place and begged to speak with me. I didn’t want to speak to him because even though it’s been that many months I was still very upset.
After he pleaded I gave in as I also wanted to know why he could do that to me. He explained that he was put under pressure by his family and though he loved me he was not ready to marry me as he had just finished his masters and trying to establish his business.
He begged me to take him back and although I have told him no, I cannot help but wonder. If I discuss with friends I know they will say I’m crazy and mad but I just know he was the love of my life and could not meet a man like him again. I just need to decide what to do as the whole issue is constantly on my mind.
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Dear Lily,
Three months is no where near enough time to have a clear enough mind to make such a decision. What happened was of course an emotional situation. I believe it would be pointless to just say don’t even dare as it’s clear you still love this man which is quite normal as you don’t just stop loving someone, even if they have hurt you deeply.
What I would suggest is you take your time to really think about this, after all if he really still loves you, he will wait, who knows what adventures and all sorts he has been on to make him come and realize he made a mistake, also establish if he is single or what he has been up to since you split.
I hope this helps…Let’s see advice GC readers have to offer!
SassyChic!
Send all your relationship & Love probs to me via [email protected], we will keep your identity anonymous.
ok first of all, why would he drug u along in the first place and why would he listen to his family and act so selfishly towards you. if i was in your situation, i wouldnt go there with him again but try as hard as possible to get over him and let him go because once you are married, what would his family want him to do again and what would he react gain if they stress him. also what makes you think what he is saying is true. if u love someone, you stick with them and work things out in peace but not just run off like a baby. with that said just take your time to watch him, think and pray and see what will come around just do not give in so easily for all you know he a mess and is coming to stress you again and no woman needs that put yourself first and his feelings last cos he put your last . gd luck
GC and their stories lol but we love them, well girl you better move on with your life cause this man is clearly a fool and the devil himself ever heard of the saying “old things have passed away im the new creature” besides you didn’t really give us enough information What really happen how do we know what exactly happen give us some more info to work on it. Why did he dump you before? I mean, what brought about the break up in the first place? How was your relationship with this dude like before he dumped you
@Dr Miyagi,is so sad women of today don’t learn from their mistakes….am sure he will stab her this time around.
The guy is not a decisive person and very insensitive.How can u treat a lady like dis?My advice to the lady is dat don’t accept such a man into yr life again because it is clear he can’t make decisions for himself but is rather pushed around by the family to do their bidding.He cannot tell us he knew nothing abt his schooling plans before starting the wedding preparations with u.These are some of the little signs u shouldn’t ignore.Such a person will take u for granted if u go ahead and marry him.Try and let common sense rule here and don’t let your emotions cloud yr arguement before u conclude dat all guys are the same.A word to the wise is enough.
Look sweety Im not sure you want to through the same ordeal again ayt? Then if so you better start running for ur dear life before he repeat the same thing to you ok…Look you deserve much better and this jerk of a man who isn’t ready to grow up.I would advice you to just move on and you will see a much better man out there that will appreciate you even more ok.Have a great day!
Ahhh. You paa, is this even a question. Okay you didnt get a broken heart the first time he left you, okay give him a second chance and he will surely kill you of broken heart. Women of today be like they have no brain.
You should thank God that he showed his true colours just before your wedding. He doesnt deserve you. And one thing you should always remember, “forward ever backwards never”. Say NO to him.
kick his fucking ass to the curve,he is a jerk.
Frist of all, before you consider even taking him back, you need to find out the reason he left you. his motives behind that foolish stunt he did.
Pls tell him dat u hv accepted n go to his room as if u want to hv sex, in de romancing process, cut his dirty penis n put it in his mouth, stupid man
Ooouch your evil damn hahahaha@Martha osei,
@Martha osei, I’m usually not a huge fan of Miyagi’s comments but I agree with him on this one lmaoooo, well I guess in your defense and in that regards, the asshole does deserve it; in a sense, maybe not cutting his package but something to def cause him a permanent damage.
@saada, hmmmmm
i think he came back because he saw u didnt die the first time, u got back on your feet, but this time he will make sure u die 6 feet, please run for your life and froget him, he is bad luck.
yeahhh gurlfrend… theres no need to accept such an evil heartlessman… he is soo wicked… is that hw to break up with a woman… hmmmm.. pls just give him a slap on his face n tell him not to search for u again.aaba
My dear, please watch careful and pray most importantly. That guy is not a man atall. I dont see him taking up challenges as a man. God will give you a man much better than him. A man that will love and cherish you all thru your life; come rain or sunshine.
The next disappointment might be death but God forbid. So my dear act wisely. You are a very pretty damsel in all ramification. God will give you the best. Good luck.