Last week my friend Aisha called me up out of the blue.
We hadn’t seen each other in a long time and since I wasn’t busy, we quickly decided to catch up at a restaurant in the heart of Accra. We ended up meeting three other ladies we knew from high school there so we sat at the same table….after exchanging pleasantries, we cooed about clothes, jewelry, weddings, work and finally the boyfriends!
I love my friends so much as they are intelligent and outspoken young women, and all of us are hot potatoes in every right. I am going to give you the full gist about the scoop on our boyfriends past, paast, paaast, paaaast and present. LOL.
When it comes to the subject of dating, many are the issues and varying personalities, the yardsticks and the distortions, the looks that make us go crazy and the idiosyncrasies behind each and every look!
Kindly bear in mind that I use ugly here, not as an insult to the average looking Joe, but as an adjective strong enough to carry home my point. Also, you may find situations that counter our opinion but remember we are using the majority sample and not the minority.
Now I must say, and you can choose to judge us or laugh along with us but between us 5 ladies, close to a hundred men had waltzed through our lives in one way or the other –Casual sex, Serious relationships, crushes, flirting…name it- so yes, we knew exactly what we were saying.
Now we dwelled mainly on why we would date an ugly man any day instead of a hunk.
Most of the ugly men we had all come across were studious, intelligent and financially stable…They worked hard and made sure they held their place firmly in society.
They also know how to treat a woman right because they appreciate the jewel they have, they literally threw diamonds at our feet. Begging to date us and offer us the world but in the past, because we were rather ignorant, we preferred the good looking men who we realized soon enough were inherently lazy, broke, pompous, rude, cheats and very arrogant.
The handsome men believe they are so hot, women they date should be the ones chasing and pampering them and appreciating the fact that they are dating them in the first place.
They won’t pull their weight in the relationship, Some of them think a woman should be so happy to date them; they should go as far as taking care of him. And this was confirmed when we placed a call to a hot, mutual male friend who emphatically stated that he would not take care of a woman he is dating because there are many women out there offering to take care of him so he can date them.
My issue was, young man, the woman dating you also has many men after her so should she also succumb to the men who want to take good care of her instead of dating you? No, he said. She is a prostitute or a gold-digger if she does that! Wow, men, such double standards!
Now ladies, why date a man who prefers you pampering him to him pampering you? Why date the annoying, stingy, beau instead of the ugly guy in the corner who is willing to give you the world?
One of my friends told us how she once endured a horrible relationship just because she was dating a hot young man and felt she was lucky to be with him because many people were jealous of her…SAD life!
Is the fact that you scored with the man all women are chasing exciting enough to hold on to above all else and put up with a bum?
Well, what’s important is that she has learned from this experience so much that she will never repeat such buffoonery.
Why do people exalt handsome men so much that they hold their partners to emotional ransom?
Just then, a woman in a tight blue dress walked by with a banging body and the face of an angel. This woman was so good looking even us ladies had to say so.
And she walked to the next table and sat with who?! … A boyfriend (we all agreed) who didn’t really have the looks to deserve such a beauty. We immediately burst out laughing.
What was so special about him?
Somebody mentioned the cash….and one of my friends giggle and said he probably has a big ‘load’. This brings us to another point…
Although I already mentioned that yes, most ugly men work so hard they have a financial edge over their other counterparts; it is not the only reason why sensible beautiful women will go for an ugly man. Most ugly men give HOT Bang! This is from experience…
Yes they do. Believe it or not, most ugly men get down really good! They know their shortfalls and are eager to please. So they dedicate so much time and gentleness to taking you to heaven before they even begin to think about themselves. Big ‘load’ or not, he knows how to use his thing!
As long as people keep saying and thinking that beautiful women date ugly men because of their money, they will always miss the real issues and their minds will be too blocked to land any beautiful women. Don’t make unnecessary assumptions where women are concerned…
A lot goes into our choices of partners and yes, the ugly men seem to come on top with a lot of traits that combine to blow us away!
I remember reading some comments on a picture of Menaye and Muntari on this blog-GhanaCelebrities.Com, and also on Jackie’s husband. I was weak from the ignorant remarks of many contributors who classified these men as ugly men…
Honestly, Muntari is one of the few Ghanaian men I have always had a crush on…he sizzles! And if he hadn’t married Menaye whom I respect very much, when he did, I would have been hot on his heels. 😀
Let me say that, it is the whole package, emotional and mental connection, attention, honestly, care, personality, stability…
So if you are an average looking man, please don’t despair. Walk up to a beautiful woman and start a decent, respectable process of wooing her.
And if you disagree with me, please feel free to share your unbiased and honest personal experience.
hmmmmmm interesting article and very true.well said girls
WOW! I LOVE THIS PIECE. TRUE TALK! AM A VERY BEAUTIFUL GURL WITH AN EXTEME COCA COLA SHAPE , EVEN THOUGH I VE DATED HANDSOME GUYS AND JILTED THEM REASON BEING THEY PREFER BEING TAKEN CARE OF EITHER THAN THE OTHER WAY , WHEN I DATED A NOT TOO HANDSOME GUY, I REALIZED HOW GENTLE, INTELLIGENT AND HOW THEY TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF WOMEN. SUCH GUYS BELIEVE THEY NEED TO IMPRESS AND PAMPER NICE LADIES BECAUSE THEY LOOK AT THEM LIKE A FOUND TREASURE……….KUDOS AND AS WISE AS SOME OF US ARE, DATING HANDSOME GUYS WILL FOREVER BE A NO! NO! UNLESS ONE WITH A GOOD CHARACTER. UNTIL THEN , LET ME ENJOY MYSELF WITH SOMEONE SPECIALWHO TREAT AND PAMPER ME LIKE A QUEEN.
@OBAAPA AKOSUA, Whoops, whoops!
Akosua ..lol i agree with u on this ..thats no too handsome men treat beautiful ladies as their found treasure .. they knw how to treat them well and respect them too … the too handsome are arrognat
and not matured to some extent cos most of the time their handspmnes has got in their head …
@OBAAPA AKOSUA, di wo hemaa……lol
Enjoy Yourself well ooooooooooo
@OBAAPA AKOSUA,Hmmmmmmm living in a dream land
YOU’VE SAID IT ALL, BRAVO! I WAS IN À FOUR YEAR R/SHIP WITH A HANDSOME, WELL POLISHED MAN, I DID ALL IN MY EFFORT TO MAKE IT WORK, WHILES I WAS PLAYING MY PART TO MAKE IT WORK, HÈ WAS BUSILY PAYING ATTENTION TO HIS LOOKS, BUYING CHIC CLOTHES TO GAIN MORE COMPLIMENTS FROM WOMEN (I GUESS HÈ IS GAY…….LOL)
I GATHERED MY COURAGE TO CALL IT OFF AND TRY A NOT-HANDSOME MAN, AND TRUST ME………WE’VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 4 YEARS AND SOME OF MY FRIENDS THINK IVE CAST À SPELL ON HIM,
LADIES!!!! DON’T WASTE YOUR TIME ON ANY GAY CLOTHED IN À HANDSOME MAN SKIN FOR FEAR OF STIGMATIZATION. TRUST ME, IF HOMOSEXUALITY WAS TO BE LEGALISED YOU WILL FIND OUT MOST OF ALL THESE HANDSOME, WELL POLISHED GUYS ARE G-À-Y-S!, THEY JUST USE WOMEN AS COVER UPS TO HIDE THIER SEXUAL ORIENTATION.
TO ANY MAN WHO FALLS PREY TO THIS ARTICLE, THIS ONE IS FOR YOU……..MUMU, GAY, LOSER!!!!!
85% of those men that spend hours on their looks end up being from both side I totally agree with you @KA NE WU,
@Miyagi, tanx man.
@KA NE WU,IF YOU WAST LUCKY TO CRUSH ON A GAY GUY DONT GENERALIZE EVERYTHING ON HANDSOME GUYS ,THIS NOT FAIR AT ALL ,HAVE YOU NOT SEEN UGLY LOOKING GAY MAN BEFORE ,COME ON LADY ,YOU HAVE TO KNOW IT DEPPENDS HOW THE GUY CHARACTER IS SO PLEASE DONT SAY THAT OR GENERALIZE IT …SAY SOME UGLY GUYS ARE CRUEL 4 REAL.
@27calibre (O_0 ), Sweety, i did not generalise that fact, pls dnt get me wrong, i make sure opinions is unbiased, and does not open any old wounds, sorry, if it got to you.
@KA NE WU,ahaha i was worried ,cos i think you only base on handsome guys are bad people(: and is not true
@27calibre (O_0 ), soooooo sorry Sweety, dnt take it personal oké? We are all here to Exchange ideas and opinions, no fights, ONE LOVE!
@KA NE WU,i have not take it serious my sister am just worried the article is just not fair
i really find it very diffcult to believe and understand when u say we should leave our UNBIASED experience when actually this piece is a pure feminist as in u are trying to make it sound like in every relationship the women are suppose to be treated like queens no matter what the situation may be and i do not really understand when u say we are using majority samples? Please at ur age i want to beleive that u knows that nothing comes easy and higher taste demands greater effort and i am pretty sure u are familiar with the fact in every relationship there should be understanding and compromise……..Now on my experience i do not have girlfriend and i am a nice looking person who used to live in europe here but for some reasons i decided to drop to and school in Ghana looking at life in europe here i really understood alot of things for example it was here that i really got to understood that there nothing called free lunch for every penny u want to owe u must break ur back for it now here it ma policy in life i always wants to look fly with all the expensive things u can imagine this is to butress ma point that before any girl comes into ma life i will make u understand that u do not necessary need to spend on me or take care of me as u said bcos im already better of…..Now what we really need to do is respect each other and love each,spend the most quality and memoriable time together. I think my concern with ur piece is that based on what u have observed then ugly guys are the easy targets for they will forever treasure you and uphold u in high esteem but according to my opinion i think all those things have got to do with individuals character…..dont u think this scenario can be look in a the direction of females as well for instance some guys group and all they talk abt is how spoilt city girls are and they are all abt the money as well so they will prefer to marry a girl from the village and train her in the way he likes…………Here is what i have to say when u find a nice looking guy with an annoying character what about saying to yourself i will help this dude change from these bad character of his and transform him into the man i really want him to be for and see how it works.
@Cwabena, truly unbiased bro.
huh am lucky, my bf is a very handsome igbo boy(man) n he is too good. Handsome with a gentle n cool character is very had to find… I agree with sis akosua, 3y3 aampaoooo, my friend said if u date one u r always afraid other woman will take him away from u , like u r always afraid to loose him.. 3y3 as3m ooo.
Well I luv the entire article and its so true how Cute guys are never really caring because some women tend to act too desperate and hype them like some treasure. I personally think beauty they say lies in the eyes of the beholder.I agree solely on what u said but then again the fact that all ugly men are caring doesn’t it mean every girl should start looking for them.(Some of them are actually not)There is something everyone sees in somebody that builds the attraction.The heart is very fragile and will go where it deserves.At he end of the day , Happiness is more important than anything so better luv with no condition/reason. (the natural attraction/instincts is important)
Obaabapa Akosua think of the end product of it{babies} yea is true some good looking guys behaves like that but not all of them
Another banging topic wow where do I start well beautiful women are usually secure in their looks and therefore don’t need a handsome guy to make them look good many women are also able to look beyond the exterior appearance and see the good qualities underneath. Beauty is, after all, only skin deep also beautiful women are quite common, and, as you said, handsome men not so much. Women have many supplies at their disposal to make them beautiful…make up, hair coloring, etc I have known women who have spent 6 hours a day making themselves look good (A waste of time in my opinion.) Beauty, also, is in the eye of the beholder just because you find a man ugly does not mean other women will find him so we are all attracted to different types…thank heavens, since if we all liked the same type, there wouldn’t be enough to go around!
Miyagi has spoken
@Dr. Miyagi, Doc i thought you were going to say more from your past posts. you seem to have chickened-out on this one, LOL.
@kumapem,Hahahaha lol you got jokes
@Dr. Miyagi, hey just saying. I always try to read your post first whenever i get on this forum and i honestly admire ur sincerity. keep it up bro.
@kumapem,Thanks much appriciate it
Like the piece about young GH women and older white men etc, I see the tendency to generalize based on couple of experiences. I am by no means an expert but for a relationship to survive its roller-coaster ride, both parties ( ugly women + ugly men, ugly women + handsome men, beautiful women + handsome men, and beautiful women + ugly men) must and should be willing to compromise. If one thinks he or she is much worthy than the other, the relationship will collapse. I know GH guys here in the US whom one might consider to be ugly but with cash and treat their girls poor, simply because they can find another one easily, and they do( vice versa). I have also seen good looking men who are in a solid relationship with women who have not so favorable features. Then again beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. If a guy dresses extremely well, that does not mean he has homosexual tendencies or be classified as on the Down Low. I have also seen and had classes with girls/women who dressed well with the full makeup and all that good shit, and they favor being with women. Its not just a case of apples and oranges cuz its much more than that. A marketable drug take more than ten years of research and development with trials which involves millions and yet, many side effects. Treat your women right and you will be treated right, treat your men right and you will be treated like the queen you wish to be treated. Stop all this hypocritical BS.
@collie nesta, SINCE AM PRETTY AND NATURALLY ENDOWED, I DONT THINK MY BABIES WITH MY NOT TOO HANDSOME MAN , SO SWEET AND CARING WILL LOOK UGLY WHEN THEY ARE BORN. DONT WORRY, I WILL SEND GC A PIC OF MY CHILDREN ONE DAY AND MAYBE I WILL ALSO WRITE A PIECE ON THAT TOO. UNTIL, THEN MY SWEETHEART AND I ARE GOING TO THE CINEMA . LOL
@OBAAPA AKOSUA,You sound like a KG1 girl
@Dr. Miyagi,eiii bro
Lol look at the way she is talking self confidence @27calibre (O_0 ),
what are you guys talking about,dont be deceived by this article girls, Ugly looking guys also treat girls bad aswell ,it depends on how the guy is well mannered,handsome guys treat girl best according to research.
@27calibre (O_0 ), yep is vry true n 4 me i ve neva in my entire life dated an ugly man n de fine ones i ve dated wasnt tat bad n 4 de sake of my children i wld of marry a handsome guys.De BF is vry fine n im goin 2 spend de rest of my life wit him.I knw of ugly guys tat treats lady unfairly lol..jus knw who re goin out wit tats all. Me I love my boo vry handsome lol
@Emma,thanks for supporting me,some articles deceive girls 4 real .
i advice any guy who have a woman to take care of his WOMAN because some good HEARTED WOMEN ARE a gift from GOD .
wether the MAN IS UGLY OR HANDSOME JUST PROTECT YOUR WIFY GIVE HER THE RESPECT ,WOMEN DESERVE (LOVE FROM MEN).
It could be a psychological thing.
The writer has probably dated a lot of ugly guys she’s not happy about, and as a way of pacifying that bruised ego resorted to writing holistic articles to help heal the wounds of her unsuccessful “hunk” grabbing experiences and unfulfilled hopes.
Nice piece. Negligible susceptibility to solecisms. Quality writing.
@ OBAAPA AKOSUA: go enjoy your time with your guy and i wait to see the pic of your children, wish you all the very best and hope he treat you well
Nice article but I don’t agree enitrely with u.Der are some petty mistakes some ladies especially the very pretty ones make when they’re in their early & mid 20’s when they’re blossoming and they have all sorts of men wanting to go out with them.At dis time the so called “ugly and caring” men will not even be considered especially if they’re in school or are just struggling to make it in life with a low paying job.During these times these ladies will only hang out with only the supposed “good looking” guys who don’t give a damn abt their feelings and will not listen to any form of wise counsel from anyone @ all until they hit the rocks.When they realise they’re getting older and after they’ve been disappointed by these “good looking guys” then their songs begin to change to “ugly guys are now caring bla bla bla becos probably the “ugly guy” they might never have accepted during their hay days have now become very successful and is in the position to do a lot of things for her so she has to accept him like dat due to circumstances but not necessarily because she loves him.If a lady gets whatever she wants from a man materially,why won’t she say all sorts of positive things abt him even if its not genuine?Let her ex “good looking” boyfriend appear from nowhere and see if she wont cheat with him and start professing love for him inspite of all that dis “ugly guy” myt be doing for her .However dis is not in all cases but from what I’ve observed in life so far this is what actually happens.
@TheChuckylee, i agree with u.
I love de article but think there wasn’t fairness where u wrote some of the ugly men but then generalised when u got 2 handsome men. Point is not all handsome men think n behave lyk dat, it depends on de home training they got. Trust me most of them pamper,treasure n spend on their women because their mama taught them so(frm experience). We all av our opinions i guess.
@ GC STAFF I love de article but think there wasn’t fairness where u wrote some of the ugly men but then generalised when u got 2 handsome men. Point is not all handsome men think n behave lyk dat, it depends on de home training they got. Trust me most of them pamper,treasure n spend on their women because their mama taught them so(frm experience). We all av our opinions i guess.
@Danisha,you are right the article is fulll of biaseness..
i agree with this article to some point…..i am a very beautiful lady, i’ve dated a good looking guy (who was a doctor) before and he wasnt really caring u know, it got to a time when i had to taxi myself in & out of his apartment each time i visit. He acted as if i wanted the relationship so i shld make it work. He can throw my things out of his room and his sister would keep me in her room till the next day when i can return home. When i broke up with him, he thought it was a joke because he knew i loved him so much…..now am dating a average looking guy who is a soldier, he loves me to bits, everyone in his family loves me and appreciates our relationship…..i have developed so much love for him, at first i had a perception about soldiers, but i was so wrong…..i wouldnt call him ugly because he is also handsome but not like my first guy…..hmmmm
aaaaaawwwwww am loving everything abt this article n ur comments!
i ve dated a couple of extremely handsome guys n lyk u said they fink u must pamper them………..n @ all dat! so i quit but i can proudly say i ve a great heart just that it will take the right guy to know my worth!
@wendy,Well allot of girls think going out with a beautiful guy will give them beautiful children but they don’t realise that they become slaves towards him once they show their weak point towards him that’s where he will take advantage of her by shouting on her in public, something even beat her and always give her the idea of “I’m mr I can get any girl I want”
@Dr. Miyagi, u are soooooooooooo ryt!!! my ex thought he cld get any girl he wants at anytime and worst of it too he is a doctor……hmmm now dat am dating a soldier who is not (very handsome) but loves me and gives me peace of mind, he wants to come back……oooh but he has lost me.
@Eaglebabe,You see , my dear continue with your life and never look back again as long as your happy with army guy keep it like that let mr doc burn
@Dr. Miyagi, hahahaha dats ryt huni, he is really burning, its now that he has realized how sincerely i loved him….lol
@Eaglebabe, dnt mind DOCTOR PANIE, follow AHOYA………….lol, ONE SLAP, MANY DISCIPLINED.
@KA NE WU, hahahahah Doctor panie paaa lol, u got me laughing out loud with dat one… by the way my army man is de best of de best!!! so gentle and disciplined…..am blushing….lol
@Eaglebabe,That’s my girl hahaha fly high
WELL SAID GIRL….Sick of shallow men walking around thinking they’re God’s gift to women.Mitceewwwww
I disagree with this article to some point. However, I agree that, some handsome men and beautiful women are really pain in the ass. they’d make you feel like you need them more than they need you, so you must do anything to keep the relationship going. I am not an extremely hot looking guy, I’m only an average looking guy but, trust me, I have been there, done that, so I know exactly what this girls are talking about. I have loved, cared for, and took good care of some of my ex’s. on the other hand, some women have also lavishly spent on me for fear of loosing me. It is a game. If you love someone you’d do anything to keep them, if you don’t love them you don’t give a hoot if they disappear. I must also state that, I don’t believe in stereotyping or generalization. people are people, ugly or handsome, if they love you you’ll get the best out of them, if they don’t love you, you’d feel unloved, used, betrayed, jilted. What a handsome man can do, an ugly man can equally do same, it all depends on the individual.