Dear GC,
I’ve put myself in a compromising situation which has an easy answer if I use my head and not my heart. I’ve known my best friend since we met at college and have met her family several times. Even when we went to different universities we remained close.
I’ve spent countless nights over the years at her family’s house and get on well with her parents. I always thought her folks were the perfect couple. I’m from a single parent home so I always felt a bit envious that she has younger hip and trendy parents.
After University my friend told me her parents split. I was very shocked when I heard her mum had cheated on her Dad and she basically fled the country with her Dad’s best friend.
I’d visited her dad a few times with my friend since the drama and have seen him very devastated. All I kept thinking was but he is perfect so how could she? I always thought men were the bad ones that cheat and lie. I really felt bad for him.
A month ago my friend was running late for us to go visit her dad. She was worried he was not looking after himself so she visited him every weekend.
I got there early and he was in the lounge. As we chatted, I felt and was pushed by the feeling to kiss him, so I did and he didn’t stop me. When I heard my friend open the door I quickly pulled away.
I’ve since seen him every weekend when my friend is not there and we have slept together.
The lies and secrecy is killing me. I’m in a dilemma because I am in love with my friend’s Dad. I know he is almost 30 years older but I can’t stop myself. He wants us to leave and move away so we can be together and I am not sure if I should.
From: Lisa
__________________________________________________________________
Dear Lisa,
It sounds to me that you are too emotionally involved in this situation. As you have stated, it’s obvious you know you need to make a rational decision; otherwise you both would have been on a plane to somewhere.
You should take a step back from this situation and consider this. This man is not only in a vulnerable state of emotion; he has also been rejected and humiliated by the love of his life.
Can you really take all this on? Even if you are strong enough to do that, starting a relationship with lies and deceit is never a good foundation. All relationships can’t be perfect or is without some sort of drama however betrayal is a different thing altogether.
Yes it would be easy and obvious for me to say you are looking to him as a father figure, maybe you are but the main issue is have you really consider the implications of loosing friends and maybe family?
The very fact that he is asking you to leave means he knows its not right. When you fight or argue or he leaves, who will be your support if you are miles away and alone?
I’m wondering also whether you have thought about the fact that your friend has just him as an available parent for now? Do you really want to be the reason she losses a second one and be left with no immediate family?
It is definite that you have a lot more too lose than you have to gain here. Give this a good thinking before you jump the cliff.
Good Luck
Regards,
SassyChic!
Send all your relationship & Love probs to me via [email protected]
This is gonna sound harsh but oh wells I’m gonna say it!!!…first of all Lisa I do not feel sorry 4 u one little bit n if u were MY best friend n I caught u doing something like that with my dad…uh-uh you would be 6ft under by now
I don’t know who’s more trifling- u or your best mate’s dad?!?…nah actually you know what I’m gonna say it’s u…cos you’re da 1 that made da 1st move yeah….BUT on the other hand your BEST mate’s dad is like 30years older than u so he should have known better with his grown-ass perverted self…u need 2 get your act together and stop this “thing” (i refuse 2 even justify it by calling it a relationship) that’s going on between u and your BEST mate’s father….it’s not even the age thing that’s bothering me it’s da fact that’s she supposed 2 be your girl….like she trusted u sooo much she brought u around etc etc…instead of being there 4 her at a time when she needs u (2 help her through her parents’ split)…there u are dropping your knickers 4 her daddy…naaaaaahhhhh man that’s just plain trifling
you and the dad should be disgusted with yourselves…how do you sleep at night?-nah seriously I’m curious how can u sleep at night knowing you’re betraying your BEST mate like this?….do you seriously think this is gonna be a happy ever after thing? LMAO…ok if u do then all i gotta say is come back down from dreamland…no matter which way u look at it this will all end in tears (most of them will probs come from your BEST mate)…when u get found out (oh n u will get found out-truth always comes out eventually) the damage that will be caused will probably be irrepairable!!
Before I leave u alone now 2 go , sit infront of a mirror and just continuously slap yourself silly (no seriously please go and do that) I want you to think about something…do you really “love” your BEST mate’s dad as u say?or are you just confusing paternal love with something intimate?…u did say u came from a single parent home so maybe getting that kind of paternal love that u never had -even though u don’t say which parent wasn’t in your life i’ll just assume- you’ve now gone and distorted that with passionate love
oh and for your BEST mate’s dad ask him to think about this- what if the shoe was on the other foot- how would he feel if one of his best friends was shagging his daughter??!!
This is reason why I feel your comments all the time i love your answer lol
Lol thanx boo…x
ahhhhhhhhh regina bo ho biom.. lisa how would u feel if da tables had turned
i bet u wouldn’t like it and since u noe ur not doing da rite thing n dat ur only gonna hurt and betray ur best friend den y do it.. to me itz like ur being selfish and
dnt care if u hurt her or loose her friendship forever. come on girl
dis is da tym u need to be there for her cuz she needs u dnt add
pepper to her already burning sore………SMDH ( AND TO THINK DIS
KINDA SITUATIONS ONLY HAPPEN IN MOVIES..)
This is krazy….. i havent read what she’s written but she says the man’s wife cheated on her hubby & run away right??? they werent seeing each other then…. it was only when she jilted him and left. so if they love each other, whats the BIG DEAL about that???
if your best friend breaks up with her boy friend and after two years you happen to meet this guy some where & you two fall for each other, would you say no to him because he has dated your bestfriend before when you perfectly know it isnt his fault they broke up but your best froend’s fault ( probably she found a richer guy or something). you would sacrifice true happiness because you’ll feel you are betraying your friend??. i think you should be slapping yourself in front of a mirror & not her. GROW UP !!!!! THE WORLD IS BECOMING MORE ADVANCE THAN YOU THINK… LMAO!!!!
This is krazy….. i havent read what she’s written but she says the man’s wife cheated on her hubby & run away right??? they werent seeing each other then…. it was only when she jilted him and left. so if they love each other, whats the BIG DEAL about that???
if your best friend breaks up with her boy friend and after two years you happen to meet this guy some where & you two fall for each other, would you say no to him because he has dated your bestfriend before when you perfectly know it isnt his fault they broke up but your best froend’s fault ( probably she found a richer guy or something). you would sacrifice true happiness because you’ll feel you are betraying your friend??. GROW UP !!!!! THE WORLD IS BECOMING MORE ADVANCE THAN YOU THINK… LMAO!!!!
Lisa,i think u shd let de man go..ur best frnd wont ever be able to livre wit de idea of u being her stepmother..its gonna destroy her relationship wit both u n her dad…n trust me wen it cums 4 de dad to choose between u(lisa) n her daughter,hey hes gonna choose his blood n u’ll b left straned n miserable..its better u end it now..just let him go n find urself ur own man..spouse who get separate ve de highest chance of cumin bac..so u neva no how God works..wen it cums 2 marriage,even divorce couple cum 2geda n not runaway wives…its gonna b hard ba let dat man go n let him take care ofhis daughter…
WELL SAID CICI…
lmao what advice do you really need for being this trifling.SMDH
“I’ve put myself in a compromising situation which has an easy answer if I use my head and not my heart” Well ta dah, there you go, u said it perfectly well. use ur damn head. You definitely know the solution to this issue, so my friend do just that. hmmm #SOME WOMEN. *shrugs*
Yes but matters of the heart are always messy and what women is in her right mind when she is ruled by her heart…that is why she is writing in….
Yes that is why she’s writing in and that is why I’m also giving my opinion. while I understand your point I also believe that there should be a balance between matters of the heart and matters of the mind. There shouldn’t be mixed up cuz that is when things goes badly wrong. aint nothing wrong with falling in love with ur mind. you can fall in love with ur heart and still take charge of it. There’s a fine line between falling in love and falling into love. the “in” is natural and the “into” is forceful at least that is my opinion. In this case, sista girl has forcefully fall into love with her best friends dad. not cool at all.
Very true it’s worse than not cool and in our logical minds we make logical decisions. so yep this chick has defo fallen into love as you pointed out . That is y when my friends who are in dodgy relationships and they are upto their eyeballs in lust and ‘love’ and they are the only ones that don’t see why being in such bad relationships are wrong…it’s pointless telling them to leave. They will neither heed nor hear you because they are thinking with their over emotional and logical heart. The idea of being without the person no matter how bad he treats her is no where near for them as painful as being without the person so you telling them to leave is a waste of time and they will block you out or become defensive. I’ve seen the most smart, successful respected women fall to pieces at the hands of a wrong man because she cannot get out of the emotion she is tied up in. All she knows is the pain she will endure being without that I’ve seen it time and time again…dont make sense but that’s how it is.
@lucious Are you still looking for your roots in the Cassava farm or what because your not making any sense at all
hahhahah Miyagi will kill me ooo.lmbo
YOU KNOW THAT GUY LUCIOUS IS LOOKING FOR A MIND TO HELP HIM SHARPING HIS BLUNT ONE BECAUSE HE HAS RUN OUT OF WISDOM HENCE HE IS STRUGGLING, IF ONLY HE WILL SHOW SOME RESPECT, HE COULD HAVE BEEN SHARP-IND! WELL YOU DO NOT BEG A MAN TO RESPECT, YOU SUBJECT HIM TO DO SO.
I call the BS flag on this
I think your case is not too difficoult since the man wife had left him idle and the man is in passio but why don,t you tell your friend that you are in love with her father and i think your friend will be happy for that also you can live there with the man without leaving, one thing you have to know is that, can that man believe you? find out from him then there is no harm to settle down with him thank you
I co-sign that Bruh. If Lisa want to discuss this matter to any human being before it spark more fire it should be her BEST friend mate. Telling her best friend mate now “might” bring the final drama to an end with less consequences, yes with less consequences.
Cot damn, I can pictured this story like as if I was watching Ghollywood or Nollywood movie with Jackie Appiah playing Lisa….holy shit.
@weapon x hahahahahah jackie playing Lisa I hope your not starting any drama here bruh hahahah
@ Miyagi
ha….yea Bruh. Since she known for sticking her coochie in every godamn movie I would love to cast her for a leading role as Lisa.
Hey? I think I got an idea and I’m gonna be rich of this. The gold-mind idea is that I should illustrate Lisa story more and sell it to the “horny man ” Socrate Safo A.K.A. Long John for a movie and cast Jackie Appiah as Lisa and Waakye as Lisa best friend dad.
As for GC, please don’t bash me when “Hot Fork part 2” or “Hot Spoon part 1” Starring Jackie Appiah and Waakye shows up because as soon as I collect my money from the Mr. horny man “Soctate Safo” I will exclude my name as a executive producer. Peace y’all.
@weapon-X
Hahahahhaha you got me almost choking hahahhahahahah bro your one crazy ass hahahhahahha but i love that idea hahhahahah shiiiiit
haha….y’all already know Bruh. Sometimes I’ll like to play with GC staff…lol…
lol 😀 jokes!
Some girls of today have some devilish lust spirit papa!!Eh I cant even tell why some ppl act like that.So lisa you want to be a step mum to your best friendb roght?And you think She is going to be happy about that?Use ur thinking cup.Remember you would also be a mum someday and this could happen to you.Well, the earlier, the better, stop sleeping with that old man and go look for a better guy to settle with.
Well spoken adjoa nbaaso
THIS IS JUST TRIFLING! why the fuckk would you have a relationship with your friends daddy? IS LITERALLY NASTY!!
Lolz….I dont think Lisa actually has a problem. She is just being childish and greedy, ready to drain the old man of his money and property. Why should you go kissing your friends dad….and u claim its love? She already knows the solution, using her head and not her heart. Talking of heart, i dont even think she even has a heart that loves this man. I wish i knew her best friend…i would have informed her instantly..lolz…
@ Akosua
I agree baby girl. Is not even we “think.” She trying milk that sugar daddy because if you think of it, who is in her right mind will have a serious relationship with someone who is 30 years older than she/he?
ight, if she wanna milk him that fine…lol….but don’t marry or be in a serious relationship with his old ass.
Lisa think about this very .soon you are going to be sorry
very nice point there. don’t no why u got the thumbs down.lol
referring to lucious
u are very stupid…..go on and sleep with him….shame
I THINK LISA SHOULD FIRST OF ALL ASK HER SELF WHAT SHE IS IN FOR
MONEY,FAME ,LIKE TO TASTE HOW SUGER DADDY IS OR WANT TO BETRAY HER FRIEND.
when i talk some idiots will say Opanin is harsh. how can u tell me u want to get into a realtionship with your bestfriends father who happens to be 30 years older than u?? lets give dis girl 25 years, that means the man is 55years. what do u wanna do with a 55 year old man???? if u care abt your friend, u’ll stop this nonsense this very minute. u’re not in any compromising situation, u’re in a stupid situation. as Reggie said, slap yoursself several tyms to get bak to reality.
This is krazy….. i havent read what she’s written but she says the man’s wife cheated on her hubby & run away right??? they werent seeing each other then…. it was only when she jilted him and left. so if they love each other, whats the BIG DEAL about that???
if your best friend breaks up with her boy friend and after two years you happen to meet this guy some where & you two fall for each other, would you say no to him because he has dated your bestfriend before when you perfectly know it isnt his fault they broke up but your best froend’s fault ( probably she found a richer guy or something). you would sacrifice true happiness because you’ll feel you are betraying your friend??. i think you should be slapping yourself in front of a mirror & not her. GROW UP !!!!! THE WORLD IS BECOMING MORE ADVANCE THAN YOU THINK… LMAO!!!!
That is nothing wrong. Keep going on with your emotion.