This week’s discussion is inspired by the new Cargo Gin Bitters advert currently running on television in Ghana. In this advert, a man was asked to spell C-A-R-G-O to hurriedly take his wife away. He did and took his wife away. Spelling the five lettered word was the dowry or bride price the man paid to the lady’s father. Funny I know.
The above might seem like a funny advert to sell a product but then it makes a lot of sense. Which man doesn’t want to get married, have kids and enjoy the good things in life? Before getting married, there are long list of requirements that must be met by the man to the woman’s family.
I eavesdropped on a conversation between two middle aged gentlemen. The conversation was centered on the fact that one of the men wants to get married to his long time sweetheart but one thing seems to be the stumbling block. You can guess what it was by now, right?
The tall list of things to be bought and the paying of the dowry seems to be weighing heavily on Mr. Lover man’s head. However, if am not exaggerating the things to be bought apart from the normal things we know are really crazy, as if to say the man is Father Christmas to offer gifts just like that.
Crazy in a sense that some of the things in the list are outrageous; you then begin to wonder if you are paying the dowry for 50 girls. I am not saying parents should give out their girls for free.
Earlier on, a close friend also disclosed similar things to me, about holding on his marriage because he couldn’t afford the things asked by the lady’s family. Before then I had watched an African movie where a man wants to marry his sweetheart. The man was asked to buy things which are used in building houses, as if the man is coming to build a house instead of marrying his loving woman.
How difficult is it for parents to know that they can’t recoup all they have spent on their daughters overnight? Can we not say that the high price of dowries asked by parents can also partly be blamed for the broken homes we have in Africa?
I know there are thousands of ladies out there, whose marriages have been put on hold because of needless dowries required from their parents from their suitors.
Now, let’s get talking… As a man, are you ready to pay sky-scraping bride prices? What is the most you would ever think of paying or paid?
As a woman, what is your take on bride prices? What or how much would you want a man to spend on your head? Are you in support of the needless bride prices that parents demand?
I know guys who ended up splitting from their spouse-to-be because the parents were just being ridiculous with their demands. I have a Sudanese friend who went home to marry his gf and he ended up paying $5,000 ! WHY? In these instances some men feel they own the women because they payed the price they were asked.
ONE THING THAT AMUSE ME IS AFTER ALL THIS CLASSIC,ELEGANT,MORDEN AND EXPENSIVE WEDDINGS THESE WEDDINGS CAN NOT HOLD FOR A LONG TIME.THE LONGER YEARS YOU CAN GET IS 4,5 YEARS AND DEVORCE FOLLOWS.SOME EVEN START FIGHTING ON THE SAME MONTH OF THE WEDDING AND START SEEKING FOR DEVORCE.HAVE WE TOUGHT OF WHAT ACCOUNT FOR THESE?
LET ME TELL PARENTS WHO COME HERE AND ALL OF US THAT IT IS NOT ABOUT HOW BIG OR LONG LIST OF BRIDE PRICE THAT YOU MAKE THAT MAKE THE WEDDING STAND OR MAKE THE MAN KNOW THE LADY IS EXPENSIVE. BUT RATTHER LOVE.SOME MEN AFTER PAYING ALL THIS THINK THAT THEY OWN THE LADY AND START USING HER LIKE SOMETHING.SOME LADIES WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS AND THAT IS WHERE PROBLEMS STARTS.
SOME ALSO SPEND A LOT OF MONEY ON THE SO CALLED BIG WEDDINGS AND AFTER CAN NOT PAY THEIR DEBT AND BANKS AND FRIENDS WILL BE ON THEM.
ONE FUNNY THING TOO.AFTER THIS CLASSIC,ELEGANT,AND EXPENSIVE WEDDINGS AFTER MARRIAGE THEY END UP IN A RENTED ROOM.I AM NOT SAYING LEAVING IN A RENDTED ROOM IS BAD HELLL LL NO.WHAT IM SAYING HERE IS SPENDING THIS MONEY ON USELESS BIG WEDDINGS, AND AFTER COME AND STAY IN A RENTED HOUSE WHY DONT YOU HAVE A SIMPLE WDDING AND USE PART OF THE MONEY TO BUY A LAND OR BUILD BUILD A HOUSE.
WE ARE ALSWAYS COPING FROM THE WHITES AND WE INTEND TO COPY MORE THAN WE CAN CHEW.EVEN MOST WHITES , I MEAN THOSE WHO ARE RICH NOT ALL OF THEM HAVE SUCH BIG WEDDINGS LIKE IN GHANA HERE .AND YET WE SAY THE ECONOMY IS BROKE.SOME SPEND SOO MUCH THAT AFTER THE WEDDING THEY CANNOT EVEN PROVIDE FOR THEMSELVES.THAT IS WHEN THEY SIT DOWN TO THINK OF HOW STUPID THEY HAVE BEEN.WHITES LIKE SIMPLE BUT YET BEAUTIFUL WEDDINGS.IF WE ARE COPING HOW THEY PLAY NUDE IN THEIR MOVIES,HOW THEY DRESS THEN AMA GHANA AND KOFI GHANA WE ALSO HAVE TO COPY AND LEARN HOW THEY GO TO THE SKY AND HOW THEY SPEND TIME MAKING WONDERFUL THINGS TO MAKE THE WORLD GO AROUND LIKE THY DO THAN TO COPY THIS TO ME STUPID THINGS.
TO THE PARENTS, PLEASE IF YOU ARE TO CALCULATE EVERYTHING YOU SPENT ON YOUR CHILD AND GIVE IT TO SOMEONES CHILD TO PAY AS A BRIDE PRICE THEN I DONT THINK YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. I MEAN WHO CAN PAY ALL THESE.CALCULATE FROM INFACY TO ADULTHOO CAN EVEN BUILD A PALACE .HELLLLL NO ,NOBODY CAN DO THAT.STOP MAKING MEN THINK THAT YOU ARE SO DESPERATE OF MONEY AND THAT YOU HAVE TO USE YOUR DAUGHTER AS YOUR BREAKTHROUGH.
I KNOW A TIME WILL COME THAT SOME WILL BE ASK TO BUILD HOUSES.
TO THE LADIES.JUST SIT THERE AND LISTEN TO YOUR FRIENDS AND PARENTS THAT IF HE DOES NOT ORGANISE AN EXPENSIVE WEDDING DONT MARRY HIM.THOSE SO CALLED FREINDS EVEN WISH SOMEONE HAS ASK FOR THEIR HAND IN MARRIAGE.YOU WILL BE IN THE HOUSE AND GROW OLD WITHOUT ANYBODY MARRYING YOU.THAT IS WHERE YOU WILL BECOME DESPERATE AND BE LOOKING FOR SMALL BOYS OR A MARRIED MAN.SO FAR AS YOU LOVE YOUR MAN GIRL GO FOR IT DONT MIND WHAT PEOPLE WILL SAY.YOU KNOW YOUR PEOPLE, I MEAN GHANAIANS WHAT EVER YOU DO THEY WILL TALK.WHEN YOU ARE BROUTH HOME THEY WILL TALK.WHEN AFTER THIS BIG WEDDINGS YOU GROW LEAN BECAUSE YOU CNNOT EAT GOOD FOODS THEY WILL TALK SO DONT MIND THEM.SAAAAAAAAAAA NA GHANA TE.OOOOOH AMA’S WEDING WAS TALK OF THE TOWN SO HOW IS YOURS GOING TO BE.DONT MIND THEM.DONT EVER THINK YOUR FRIEND HAD AN EXPENSIVE WEDDING SO YOU ALSO WANT YOURS LIKE THAT.STICK TO YOUR SIMPLE BUT YET BEAUTIFUL WEDDING AND I BET YOU WILL HAVE A WONDERFUL MARRIAGE LIFE.
TO THE MEN SEEKING FOR LADIES HAND IN MARRIAGE.IF YOU GO AND THEY GIVE YOU LONG SHEET AND YOU CANT BUY THEM DONT GO AND THINK OR COLLECT ANY LOAN WHEREBY YOU CANT PAY.LEAVE HER AND LET HER PARRENTS GET THE BIG WEDDING MAKER FOR HER.I KNOW WHAT PEOPLE WILL SAY ABOUT THIS.YOU CANT SPEND MILLIONS OF MONEY ON A WEDDING.LEAVE HER AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WANTS SIMPLE WEDDING AND PLAN YOUR FUTURE WITH.
its true though, ma cuz almost lost her husband b’cos da demands fm her father’s family.i guess there’s a reason 4 bride price so da man would take serious,
WHETHER THEY PAY PAY 5DOLLARS OR 5MILLION DOLLAR, MARRIAGE IS MARRIAGE. IT IS NOT BASE ON HOW MUCH BRIDE PRICE ONE IS ABLE TO PAY BUT RATHER LOVE, TRUST, HONESTY, RESPECT ETC. IT IS BETTER TO SAVE SOME MONEY, INSTEAD OF USING ALL UR LAST ON THE MARRIAGE AND THEN NO U GUYS STRUGGLING AFTER THE MARRIAGE!!!!!!!!