Being a Ghanaian SUCKS—And Here Are the 14 Reasons

Of course there are a lot of interesting things you get when you are a Ghanaian but these things do not come anywhere close to those important things you may never get in your entire life—and that really sucks.

As a Ghanaian, you may get to enjoy some regular delicious ‘wakyee’ and even that, you have to be careful else you would catch some Cholera, a disease that was eradicated from places like the UK over 100 years ago…

To highlight my ‘appreciation’ of the depreciating nature of Ghana and its citizens, I have put together my 14 reasons why it SUCKS to be a Ghanaian…

1. You Become A Threat to Every Developed Country & Their Embassies

You may not have realized this because you have not thought about travelling to any of the developed countries before—or even if you have, you are NOT smart enough to notice the big signpost on your own forehead which reads; ‘I am a Ghanaian so beware’.

My two friends are currently on a world travel and they have less than 2000 pounds each but every country they planned visiting will grant them entry and they acquired several visas for the few countries that their British passports wouldn’t automatically grant them entry without any hustle.

If you are a Ghanaian and you even have huge cash sitting in your bank with countless reasons why you want to visit any developed country, they still find it difficult to grant you a visa—because you are basically a threat to these countries and if you are easily allowed in there, they think you wouldn’t return to Ghana as you’ve told them.

So you are not just a threat to their country, they see you as a liar by default (you have to prove to them you are not a liar) and also, you are regarded as someone who wants to become an illegal immigrant in their country.

Even if you are lucky to be granted the visa, more troubles and questioning await you when you reach the airport of your destination. They change the same questions around just to trick you into lying because they believe you are a goddamn liar by virtue of being a Ghanaian.

Of course I would be suspicious of someone coming into my country where I have consistent water and electricity supply, good roads and an effective all round system—especially if the person is coming from a place like Ghana where electricity can’t flow for just a week without interruption. And a place where women who deliver by cesarean section in the best government hospital-Korle Bu have to still climb stairs the very day to take their bath, as my friend recently stated.

2. You Live With Those Who Hate the TRUTH

If you ever decide to go out there looking for the biggest hypocrite in life and you meet a Ghanaian, turn back—you have met who you are looking for.

If all the stories in the Bible were true stories, Ghanaians would have been part of the Pharisees — the social and political movement during the Second Temple period.

We are the biggest hypocrites out there in the world and if you think otherwise, then that is just a confirmation of what I just said. You are simply being a hypocrite and will always hate the truth.

From our Political settings to our Entertainment industry, no one seems to say the truth or has the ear to even listen to it.

Lies which are politically clothed as propaganda has come to stay with us, grown with us and has become part of our existence.

No politician yearns for the TRUTH in Ghana. And this translates so well with their followers who are hypocrites themselves. We lack all that we claim to possess and yet we cannot be truthful to ourselves to bare the cross.

A Ghanaian will smile with you, say you are great or your work is the best, when in fact your work is the worst.  The moment you are not around, the same person will make a mockery of you and your work.

We just hate the truth and I do not see a way out of this, because, we will not even accept that this is what we are…

People will shower you will undeserving praises in Ghana when you are around them, simply because they want a back pass, knowing that you do not deserve any of those praises. The sad part of it is that, maybe if you are told the truth, you will work harder or make things better.

In the spirit of deceit and hypocrisy, we are all suffering one way or the other.

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 3. You Have No Electricity and Yet Pay Exorbitantly For It

Being a Ghanaian sucks brutally and sometimes you wonder why God placed you in a country where you pay for things you never get to enjoy—that is if you believe there is a God who actually did this to you. This God must hate you or must think it’s cool to play ping-pong with your life…

You are never able to enjoy your electricity by using it for what you really need it for. The moment you really need power is when it will be taken off—yet at the end of the day, you will still have to pay exorbitant electricity bills.

I do not want to add the water and internet bills to this; you never really get what you pay for if you are a Ghanaian—and on top, no one gives a hoot even if you complain.

You are always shoved from the backside—and regarded as a big donkey by those up there!

4. You Become the Definition of Corruption

Maybe I should call it extortion instead of corruption….Whatever it is, Ghana is seriously sick as a country and finding a just man to cure this national canker will forever be difficult as the society and its institutions are inherently corrupt.

You can imagine the despair on my face when I was greeted at the Kotoka International Airport with an open request to pay out to a Customs Officer in uniform and on duty after a long flight from Amsterdam to Accra-Ghana…

Though this Customs Officer was making a mere request, his posture, uniform and diction pushed it beyond a request—-making the whole atmosphere uncomfortable and daunting for me.

I was struggling to push my 3 bags on one of those Airport trolleys, sweating out of the warm air which had given me the usual Ghanaian welcome when a Customs Officer called me to his corner…

I thought he was going to inspect my bags so I quickly went into my pocket for the little padlock keys.  With an attitude which suggests he is not new to this and has no fear or shame in doing it, he loudly asked; what did you bring for me?

As if he was one of my cousins or there was a way I could have known of his existence, he pushed further by saying ‘anything little will be fine….I can see you are in a hurry so something little and we do not have to go through all the bags’.

At this stage, I felt embarrassed and silly—Do I look like a punk to this man, I asked myself. I guess it was not about how I looked, but the convention in Ghana—-where people in uniforms extort money from those they come in contact with.

In a disappointing voice backed by a head shake, I told him I did not have anything on me for him, and basically ‘all I have in the bags are personal stuff’. But he is free to check them, offering the keys to him….

I am sure he felt disappointed that this punk of a man was a little smarter and there was no way he was going to make any money out of me.

Fortunately for me and unfortunately for another, a certain lady was spotted struggling with her bags too—approaching us.  The disappointed Officer quickly marked my bag with a white chalk and rudely said, you can go now…

I guess he was on a quick move to try it on the innocent lady.

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5. Your Ghanaian Education Makes You as Dumb as a Cockroach

There isn’t any well capturing definition of education out there that I’ve come across—and not that I have not seen several of them. The problem is; the structure, meaning and substance of education changes with the tick of time. But this seems not to be the case for that hell of thing we call education in Ghana.

If pushed to the wall, I would opt to define education as; the acquisition of knowledge and valuable skills, socialisation and moral development—with discipline being the cornerstone…

Socrates was right when he made the assertion; “knowledge is virtue” and this perfectly makes a greater number of “Ghanaian educates” virtuous but less skilful and valuable, as our educational system is very much about acquisition of knowledge through the mastering of dead men theories and arguments—leaving behind critical thinking and analysis.

Throughout my Education in Ghana (to College level), I did not see any drastic shift in teaching and learning methods when in fact, there ought to have been as I progressed. What is expected at each stage of the educational ladder must be different and I am not talking about the complexity of what is being taught and learned. I am referring to how the impacting and consuming have to take place.

In Charles Dickens’ 1854 published “Hard Times”, he states among other things that children must be parked with as much knowledge as possible as this gives room to both character and sound education. That is children, but this is how I feel I was treated throughout, during my education in Ghana.

I wouldn’t want to hear the lack of facility argument because to be frank, we do not have exceptionally poor educational facilities in Ghana, it is our teaching methods, understanding of education and learning methods that somewhat makes us leave the various openly praised educational courtyards as dumb as cockroaches.

You can call it bragging but I must say, I had my College education at one of the best Senior High Schools in Ghana-Adisadel College, and I left there with a distinction. Now you want to know what this distinction meant I knew?

I could recite the whole Economic text book; I could make good Albert Venn Dicey photocopying arguments—word for word as written in the Government text book. I studied Geography and had an A there too, which meant, I was walking around at the time with a mirror version of Bennett’s mind—not that I perfectly understood any of the structures, developments and arguments in Geography.

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6. You Would Have More Churches Than Schools & Hospitals Wherever You Live

 I am not sure about the last time you visited where you originally come from in Ghana—be it a small town or a village. But an overdue trip I took to my town in the Brong Ahafo Region after having been absent for nearly a decade got me thinking…

It is a common global tenet that education is the key to living a meaningful, successful and non-oppressed life. Coupled with good health facilities, mankind will be able to pursuit happiness and engage in national development.

The importance of education cannot be highlighted enough in this piece—without education, we open ourselves to all sort of societal backlash and economic disasters.

I was pretty excited when I approached my town which was under heavy developmental attack—I saw a neatly built hotel, a gas station and several gigantic billboards on entering the town.

As I got closer, I realized all the gigantic billboards were for churches. At that point, it did not strike me to think beyond that. I was hoping to see similar billboards for other important amenities such as hospitals, schools and even youth or adult clubs.

Since nothing of such nature caught my attention, I descended into a false assumption that signs to these things may be at the other side of the town. Concluding that, indeed things have changed out here for the better…

When I got home and managed to greet all the folks I had not seen for ages, I brought up my observation for discussion. I asked my cousin what are the new schools in town or close to us.

Shockingly, she mentioned that no new school had been established in the area, adding that; the town has been blessed with 3 new Primary and Junior High schools with only one Senior High School.

Since I could hear people singing praises from where we sat, I asked; is there a church behind us? She quickly answered; yeah, they’ve started their usual Friday all-night service.

I was pulled into a pool of shock when I learned that over 8 churches have been built just at our area and total of over 35 churches currently exist in the small town which has just 1 hospital, a non-working clinic and less than 7 schools.

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 7. You Must Suspend Your Thinking Faculty In Order to Be Able to Drive in Ghana…

My 5 days trip to Ghana has ended and now that I am back to the UK, I surely have a lot to write about…

A lot has changed for good in Ghana but more for the worse. The few politicians and privileged individuals are living like Queens and Kings, and the masses are wondering around in poverty—-a hallmark of a broken economy and injustice.

Years ago, I used to be a ‘damn’ chief driver in Ghana. There was no corner I could not drive to, except that on one occasion, my BMW got into a huge accident near the Land Commission Offices at Cantonments-Accra. Even then, I was not the one driving, I was just a passenger.

My friend loaned me his car for the 5 days that was in Ghana and since I was with people all the time, there was no need to drive.

But there came a time I had to go for a meeting and my friend who sort of became my ‘chauffeur’ wasn’t around.

So I jumped into the driving seat and after 30 minutes of driving, I begun to sweat even though I had the air-condition on full blaze.

The traffic condition seems not have changed a lot but the driving was the worse I have seen in my years.

At this stage, I asked myself; was I part of this ‘beautiful driving scheme’ where almost everyone seems to be driving without thinking?

Majority of the drivers shown no indicators, they cut in front of you without you giving them permission and anytime you get to a roundabout, you begin to wonder if there are Road Traffic Rules in Ghana.

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8. You Or A Lot of People Around You Are Tribalistic & Believe ‘Ewes Have Bad Body Odour’, the ‘Ashantis Are Thieves’ the ‘Akwapims Are Fools’ & the ‘Fantis Are Lazy’

No one can underestimate the importance of a tribe and its significant position in creating a true sense of belonging. Divisions in general kept us alive some centuries ago, fighting together and marrying our own—opening our arms for those we identified as our blood and protecting ourselves from those who were not part of us—the enemies.

It was very important to belong to a tribe and to have clansmen who will pull out the sword to cut throats so you and your family will live on. Without such organised groups of people living together and serving as watchdogs over one another, people from far away lands would have probably conquered and taken away lands and put certain men and women into slavery.

Even though there were days when tribes had important role to play in our survival, such divisions have always created tension between people. The tension didn’t matter much those days since you didn’t really have to deal with other people that often—or travel out of your land to meet others.

Today, we are not grouped by tribes but by vision and a search for a better life for ourselves—and offspring. Increasingly, people from different tribes have had to abandon their own people or land and travel miles away to foreign lands to settle. And those who even stayed behind on tribal lands had no option than to welcome alien tribes who found their place of settlement their best option.

Things have changed, technology and innovation have brought us far closer than ever. We are able to trade, communicate, share ideas and even fall in love with people thousands of miles away. The fight for survival has ended, giving way to what I call “the fight for our betterment” —making the benefits of holding onto tribes insignificant.

A lot has changed over the years in Ghana. Education has played a huge role in reshaping our human direction and interaction. The law has taken up the challenge in bring justice to all those who deserve it. Morals have strengthened our relationships and exchanges with one another.

Nevertheless, one thing seems to have not been touched and unmoved—TRIBALISM. Reasonably, the closer we get, the gaps found in-between the walls of divisions such as tribes should be bridged but this has not been the case.

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8. You Are Confuse as to the Meaning of Patriotism

I have always known that Ghanaians are exceptionally patriotic. Despite the many great things one can achieve with strong sense of patriotism, being ‘over patriotic’ without any room to criticize your own country/people, point out the wrongs within your country and being over sensitive when others (especially non-nationals) loudly bring to light unfortunate occurrences in your country is not patriotism, rather treacherous.

It is great that Ghanaians will defend Ghana and its people at all time. The duty to defend and uphold the good name of Ghana as a citizen is constitutionally imposed. Patriotism therefore does not only spring from our sense of belonging, it is also a citizenry requirement which must be respected.

However,  I have realized many Ghanaians do not understand and appreciate that, patriotism is not only about singing praises, it is also about nailing the negatives, pointing out the illegal activities and unfortunate occurrences happening within your country and among your people.

Patriotism is about being sincere, being watchful and above all, being critical and embracing the true state of affairs in relation to your people and country.

It is the above mentioned attributes of patriotism that many of us Ghanaians lack. We hate it to the core when someone points out the obvious destructions, poverty, corruption and anti-developmental activities which have engulfed our country or being championed by our people.

In the name of patriotism, we jump to call people who point out our follies names and in a deadly rebuttal, we quickly point out the weakness of these people or their countries too. What happened to the all-important attribute of acceptance and being sincere with the real state of affairs of your nation when it comes to patriotism?

Ghanaians simply hate to be criticized (either constructively or non-constructively); we do not criticize our own people, leaders and country as much as we will do to that of others. The irony of this is that, we are always the first to cite the iniquities of others and their countries without a room for us to accept our own.

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9. You Are Either a Greedy Bastard Or Suffering in the Hands of Such People | Ghanaians Only Cry When They are Not Part of the ‘Chopping Squad’

The strange ‘conjecture’ I’ve had to battle myself with for many years was confirmed as true over the last few days—as the economic and social conditions in Ghana obtained unbearable status.

As expected, some Ghanaians wearing ‘the truth and honest’ cloak came out, took over social media and sent out unending messages—all capturing how tough and disappointing living in Ghana has become.

On Facebook, countless discussions erupted as Ghanaians probed the activities on the ruling Government in the face of the Ghana-Brazil ‘wahala’ among other internal developments.

I joined some of these discussions and others; I was forced to be part as people kept tagging me into the heated arguments. It was fun but more importantly, we were talking about conditions which could get worst if the Government did not swiftly act to address the problems, especially the petroleum crisis…

As a Ghanaian, I’ve come to realize that the words-honesty and accountability have different meanings to most Ghanaians. And to be frank, this is the underlying cause of our many increasing political, economic and social problems.

Being honest, truthful or accountable is understood differently by Ghanaians, depending on where the person stands—not ideologically or factually determined, but ‘pocketly’ understood.

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 10. You Are Surrounded By People Who Genuinely Believe Witches Fly On Brooms in This 21st Century

I have been struggling for hours in search for a ‘proper/befitting’ title for this article. The reason why finding an appropriate title has been such a big deal for me this time is because the subject of the write-up is something that has always baffled me. And as such, I want to be able to pull many readers to have a look at this particular piece.

Africa has developed in so many ways with the socio-economic sectors being frontiers to the 21^st century development of the continent. Certain parts of Africa have seen tremendous political developments where improved political discourses are held each day.

In spite of the 21^st century developments, civilization and globalization, one aspect of the lives of many Africans continue to live in the medieval era, untouched and uninfluenced by the beauty of science, the opened mindedness and free-thinking of this century.

Fettered by fears, lack of education and our inability to fully embrace science or question things, superstition remains a robust and unchallenging force controlling the lives, minds and beliefs of many Africans.

In Africa, superstitious beliefs are held by almost every person you will come across. Even the very educated elites to some extent are incarcerated in their dark days by these beliefs. There is a little bit of such beliefs engulfed in the minds of all.

You may find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that, the religious leaders of Africa are the strong holders of the many dogmatic superstitious beliefs.

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11. You Live in A Country Where Common Sense Is As Scarce As Hen’s Teeth…

If you are not aware of the state of affairs in Ghana or have bought into the gobbledygook  propaganda being paraded by the few ‘chopping down’ the little money the economy is hanging on, let me take you down a short route of truth.

As at now, Ghana has no electricity and with this, I mean certain urban places go for 5 days without power. Small businesses such as Cold Stores which fully depend on electricity have been forced to close down.

Don’t tell me the businesses should get a generator because the Government has unconscionably increased fuel prices in the midst of the power crisis.

Secondly, despite the many water bodies we have in Ghana, living in Accra as at now is far worse than living on the Sahara desert. My auntie has to buy several ‘unclean barrels’ of water each week to keep the household going.

And if you think the above is outrageous, I bet you have not heard of the unavailability of gas and the galloping inflation which has set in on basic commodities. Even gari has doubled in price and you know what that means-students are as hungry as hell.

If it was only the above problems, I would have said; Ghana is in difficulties which would soon be solved.

Every country has its own dark days since NO where is ‘cool’. However, things in Ghana have become greater than mere difficulty as the basis of thinking and problem solving techniques-COMMON SENSE is lacking.

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12. You Are Surrounded By People Who Think Education is Not IMPORTANT Because Bill Gates Did Not Go to School…

Of course Bill Gates had a formal education and so did Mark Zuckerberg—the latter went to Harvard and the former graduated from Lakeside School in 1973 with a National Merit Scholarship. In fact, Bill Gates smashed the SAT, scored 1590 out of 1600 and also enrolled at Harvard College.

Even if it was actually true that Bill Gates did not have any formal education, it wouldn’t still make the assertion; education is not important true—as I have heard several Ghanaians ignorantly and boorishly throw out there.

I have stopped pointing it out to persons I come across who sought to balance their bigoted understanding of the essence of education on the argument that some of the world’s richest people did not obtain any sort of higher education—and wrongly, they go in for Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg.

Even if the true essence or end product of formal education camped in the accusation of knowledge is richness as some loosely argue, averaging the riches of the formally educated individuals in the world as against that of those who did not pursuit any sort of formal education would clearly show that, education is indeed important.

My greatest worry with the increasing braveness with which some Ghanaians throw out the statement; formal education is not important and quickly cite some rare examples to back their assertion springs from the fact that, they forget the most important ingredient of comparison—which is; the floor on which the battle is taking place.

It’s possible that Bill Gates or Mark Zuckerberg could still have achieved all that they’ve obtained today without any sort of formal education but sitting in the West African third world country-Ghana without the sort of opportunities, connections and support these two may have had in America—and proclaiming that, education is not important on the back of these people clearly shows why education is important because such people need one.

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13. Worse If You Are a Ghanaian in the Minority (Disable, Gay or Something Else)

I welcome any rebuttal to this article but to be frank, I don’t think there is any.

Apart from all the above, being a Ghanaian means you are compelled to live in an uncivilized society—and by this, let me borrow what John E. E. Dalberg  said, “the most certain test by which we judge whether a country is really free is the amount of security enjoyed by minorities”—which is sometimes put across as “in order to establish how civilize a society is, just consider how it treats the minority”.

In Ghana, disable people have no rights—and I do not mean rights written down in some books no one cares about. I mean, there are no efforts geared towards the realization of these rights, that is even if they exist.

You may probably be safer in Ghana as a murderer, rapist or someone who believes in evolution compared to being Gay or Lesbian—because the latter will get you lynched to death.  And before you die, your entire family will disown you.

Do not join the minority even if they are right because being an atheist, agnostic or non-superstitious is not really cool in Ghana. You would have no rights to protect your beliefs when the savages descend on you…

I don’t want to talk about how women and children are treated because I think no one really cares about these two groups of people in Ghana—and if you disagree with me, show me the care and protection given to these two groups…

14. Your Friends Do Not Really Stand for Anything—Except Money…

No one seems to have voted the NDC in power, yet they are in power—and surely, dwarfs and ghosts came out in their numbers to vote for President Mahama during the last elections. That is your typical Ghanaian situation for you—no one ever accepts what he or she has done, especially when others are watching…

I used the above example because being a Ghanaian means you have to deal with people who do not stand for anything in life—except cash, and easily you can buy the conscience of these people by offering and not necessary even paying.

I have no problem with people having different ideologies or political affiliations but at least, stand for what you believe in and defend it when your ideas or beliefs are under attack. Instead, the Ghanaian will blame another or just completely run away from the situation…

In Ghana, it’s expensive to by a chicken than the conscience of a full grown up human being—I have tested this before and it’s deadly shocking.

Now tell me, doesn’t it suck to be a Ghanaian?